Jessie, USA
My husband loves to watch scary movies and I try to enjoy this with him but every time I watch one of these movies he always falls asleep while I lay awake thinking there is someone in my house going to harm me or my 3 kids. I'm scared out of my mind. I leave all lights on and lock all doors and I still feel like I hear someone coming upstairs or someone is in my bedroom. I won't even sleep at all. Too afraid. I feel like there is something wrong with me because I'm an adult and not a child.
Richard, USA
Last year I thought the FBI was watching me because of a website I visited, even though it was legal. If I saw a helicopter and a police car or a suspicious car near me I would panic, convinced they were coming to get me. That same year I was convinced my new supervisor was plotting to get me fired or demoted. He would constantly downplay my workload for that night, hoping I would not do important work, so when the boss came in the next morning he would be annoyed and eventually fire me. I am chronically suspicious of everyone around me, fearing their going to attack me or are laughing at me. Living with this black cloud of fear and anger over my head everyday really sucks.
Ellen, Brighton
I had issues with paranoia regularly for years due to the use of recreational drugs, too many of them, not enough sleep, out all the time with a bloke who thought very little of me and people I had little in common with. It was like I was trying to appear to be a party animal but in truth my head was in bits constantly. Things needed to change. Knocked the drugs on the head, only spent time with people I knew were my friends and got rid of the bloke ...bingo..last episode was 3.5 years ago. I still have to be careful what sort of clubs I go to as memories can easily be triggered but on the whole I am feeling great, you need to know when to call it a day if a lifestyle does not suit you. You have nothing to prove to anyone so enjoy life and have some control.
Sue, UK
Well I'm quite young, and experience weird thoughts that i know are unreasonable and extreme (I KNOW!) but i just cant shake them. They vary, and sometimes i am not completely aware of them (like they're subconscious)but some examples i am aware of include being absolutely terrified of walking off a bus in case i trip or do something embarrassing, or talking to a shop assistant, or walking around a mall on my own, or being alone around a group of people (because they are talking about me)it has become so bad- i withdraw myself from social situations and i also think i have social phobia.. im just all over the place (mentally). i also think people are watching me all the time, judging me, even whilst i am inside my house, when i am alone it is even worse. sometimes they tell me things like walk straight, and smile or fix ur hair (mostly about my appearances)also it is like i can *hear* peoples thoughts, like "move out of the way, you are blocking my view of the pretty girl" and i move.
Phil, Canada
In high school I went from being really outgoing and big on friends to being somewhat of a loner. Everyone knew me and i was cool with most people but for some reason I never hung out with them and they never called me. I just did not like big crowds. I am okay with public speaking and things like that... but big social crowds wierd me out... Eventually I realized I was only meeting people online or through friends, and then I think people thought I was a bit shy. By Uni I was starting to do drugs because I was depressed alot and seemed to have really disturbing anxieties about basically everyone. My physical and mental health deteriorated pretty quickly and I am for the most part clean after 2 years or so of fairly moderate drug use.. But the problems from the drugs are mostly easily identifiably different from the every day paranoia/depression that I have had for 7 years now. At work I feel as some have said "barely tolerated" in life its always some scheme, some serious social grief i interpret... its difficult to live like this- and it gets easier and then punches you back down. Like trying to get out of quicksand.