Enrique, Mexico
Hi mi name is Enrique and this is very helpful to me cause I really couldn't ever tell people which things I was afraid of. Well many things such as people laughing at raves or partys used to scare me so much, also hear messages from the TV or the radio especific to me. Neighbors spying and hearing me. Psicodelich drugs + sensitive schizophrenic profile = very very bad idea I was paying for panic attacks and voices in my head buying drugs. I quit weed for about a year recieved medical atention and everything went better. I started smoke weed again and I found that every single time I smoke weed I get this light paranoid but now I'm aware that the problem is just in my mind in some cases with a couple of beers and smoking a minimun amount I can let the sh*t go away but sometimes I can't. I read this article about many many people who has been trough the same experience and they can calm down the anxiaty with a little medical anti-anxiaty pills. And you could say, well and why don't you just cut the hemp? Why are you so afraid of reality that you have to smoke a joint to feel fine? Well let me tell you that I'm 25 years old now, I have a kid, a job and wife. And sometimes I can't just let the bad thoughs of monotony, relationship problems that I have to anesthetize me and weed makes me happy, I inmedietly forget about work issues and I laugh with mi kid and wife and everything seems cool to me again, I know that it doesn't fix my situation but It gives me strenght to continue the next day. Thank you for reading me
Kay, Canada
I feel like once I tell someone a secret, the whole world will know. I always feel like someones watching me. I never feel alone. In public, I'm afraid that people are following me or they're gonna take me away. I even sometimes think my own parents are gonna kill me.. I'm also afraid to look out my window. I'm afraid a murderer will be right outside it. I can't really trust anyone.
Phoebe, UK
I am constantly thinking there is someone behind me I sweat so much with fear and I can't get to sleep I was that scared that I actually went to sleep with a torch on so I could keep a look out once the torch ran out of battery I thought somebody had turned it off. I found that if I forget what is happening around my and just keep my eyes shut I feel almost relaxed. Or try listening to music that usually helps me.
Raphael, Australia
I am a 24 year old single male student. Several months ago I began to suspect that my neighbors were talking about me. They would stop their conversation on their outside balcony as I entered my home as though they had just been discussing me. I then believed that I could catch snippets of conversation while inside my house, of them saying my name, the names of my visitors, physical descriptions that applied to me etc. This then continued for several months. I had been depressed (unrelated) for a couple of years prior to this. I became increasingly isolated and spent almost all my non-university time at home. Then one day I heard them discussing what I was doing in my house, short reports such as "He's on the couch" or "He's reading something". I was alarmed and couldn't figure out how they could know this. I became extremely paranoid and began checking my apartment for cameras. This had turned from banal conversation about me to being able to view me in my house. I could not understand how they seemed so normal when I would encounter them in person, and was undecided as to whether they knew I could hear them or not. I didn't know what possible motivation they had for their constant monitoring. I was completely aware of how 'crazy' this all sounded and so did not seek any help, utterly convinced that my neighbors were monitoring me. This led to an almost unbearable amount of constant stress. For reasons still unknown to me, I pretended as though I couldn't hear them while they were discussing me, and tried to go about my normal routines. Finally, I began to hear their voices when I was away from my flat, among crowds where I couldn't see where they were, and thought they were following me. I called the police and two great guys came over, it was apparent they had come across this sort of thing before and suggested I see someone at the hospital. I did, only wishing to be given some sedatives so I could sleep and not hear the voices anymore. I met a great psychiatrist and gradually increased my social interactiveness, and in those moments when I was focussing on something else I couldn't hear the voices, and eventually they stopped altogether.
Apple, Canada
Paranoia is an ugly thing. Though it is rich with delusions and empty promises, you cannot see such things until you're already enveloped in this -- thing. As a paranoiac, I contradict myself by posting here. What will this accomplish? If anything, this will detriment my survival; the world is out to get me after all, why give it more information to satisfy their own sick curiosities? An experiment, am I? I may be one of the few paranoiacs who seek help, and I may be one of the few who fully understand what's happening to me, but when you've been ripped in two, and your psyche so severely damaged, you can't not help yourself. It's so hard to go against primal instincts; your leg is broken? You'd fix it, wouldn't you? Maybe we're masochists, and a large part of us doesn't want help lest it be false, but that doesn't mean that a part of us deep down wants someone to reach out, to help. It's madness, that is what it is. Our mind's madness. I strayed from my original point but -- just stay strong, seek out help if you can. It's never too late.