It feels good to know that I am not alone. As I have got older – I am 23 now, the problem seems to have grown. It probably stems from the life I have had. I always expect and plan for the worst, and it seems that the worst is always realised. This is with both people and situations. With people, I always expect them to disappoint me in someway or another i.e. I always expect the worst in people. With situations, I always expect them to conspire against me so I end up the loser. This problem is having a real impact on my life in that I spend an undue amount of time deliberating events, instances, outcomes, and solutions. This causes me a great deal of anxiety and stress. The problem seems to have got worse over the past six months, in which I have been unemployed – after graduating. They say idle time is the devil’s workshop, and for me it’s tumultuous. I am hoping this will improve over the next year as I have decided to go back to university complete a master’s degree, although I fear it won’t. I have not told anyone about my problem out of fear that I might be branded mad. I still think there is a stigma attached to any form metal problem. If it does not improve, I hope to get help, although I don’t know how yet.
