I feel as if people that are close to me are trying to poison me, and every time I go to dinner there they are giving me more of the poison and soon it will kill me, I know they wouldn’t do it but the feeling is strong that I feel as if they are I even feel dizzy whilst eating the food and thinking of the poison, I cant be at home on my own as I feel scared that a ghost, an object or a person is going to kill me, I feel as if the light bulb is going to launch itself at me or the tv is going to hurt me, I feel as if some one is going to break in to my place and stab me, I feel a horrible feeling in my back where I am going to be stabbed, I hear voices telling me I ain’t worth nothing, they tell me people are going to die, I even feel very uncomfortable about writing that bit as the voices tell me not to, it is a deep male voice that I hear the most, it has been happening since I was little, I cant remember a age, I am 19 yrs old now, I cant have people touch me unless its my partner or my son, I get a horrible feeling even if people just touch my hand, I have to wash my hands lots of time to get rid of the feeling, I cant leave my food on the side as I think someone has been in and poisoned it or even something, I just chuck the lot away, I see things happen in my head e.g. I’ve got an image of 3 masked men standing in my living room ready to kill me I see that loads of times, and it is exactly the same picture, I see people gettin killed and myself getting killed I literally see it in my head as if it was real, I am trying to fight the voices as I am writing this it feels as if my brain is expanding and it is going to burst at any time, I am currently taking seroquil 50mgs, the physiatrist tried to say I have a personality disorder, but my cpn doesn’t agree with it I am going to be seeing a different physiatrist and this time I have to tell him everything as I bottle a lot of stuff up as it is very hard for me to say as the voices tell me not to,…
