Ever since I was a child I have felt that people are staring at me or talking about me. I used to express it but now I never do, I keep it all to myself because I know it sounds crazy.
I feel like people get in my way on purpose in stores or on the street, especially when there are only a few people around; why do they need to block me or be near me or move exactly when I move exactly where I want to move to’
I feel like some people “know” who I am, like I am famous and they know that I am watched and bothered by some kind of external force, perhaps to measure my reactions, like an experiment. And these people that stare at me are stupid because they are letting me know I am special, and I am not supposed to know. I always think they are going to get in trouble for not being discreet.
If I am not 100% perfect, at my job, at my home and in life, I get problems. I get fired for making one mistake when I spend months doing everything else right, or I park slightly off and get a ticket. I always go the speed limit, and one time I went a little fast and got a very expensive speeding ticket. If I am not perfect in every way I will get into “trouble” somehow. I spend a lot of time making sure everything I do is spot-on. When I slip up there is always someone to tell me or some penalty.
I just wonder if you are paranoid but you KNOW it sounds crazy so you never tell anyone, are you really crazy’
